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Dexter Quotes by Character
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Dexter Quotes Season 1 | Dexter Quotes Season 2 | Dexter Quotes Season 3 | Dexter Quotes Season 4 | Dexter Quotes by Character
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| Dexter Morgan |
| FROZEN BARBIE LOOKING FOR KEN "Dear Ken, I'm in pieces. Why the cold shoulder?" Love Barbie ONE RESPONSE TO "FROZEN BARBIE LOOKING FOR KEN "Dear Barbie, Be patient. One day we'll share a cold one." "If you believe that God makes miracles, you have to wonder if Satan has a few up his sleeve..." The british invasion, season 2 "There's something strange and disarming about looking at a homicide scene in the daylight of Miami. It makes the most grotesque killings look staged, like you're in a new and daring section of Disney World: Dahmerland!" ~ Dexter, Season 1  "I don't blame my foster parents for that. Harry and Doris Morgan did a wonderful job raising me. But, they're both dead now. No, I didn't kill them. Honest." ~ Dexter, Season 1 "Tonight's the night. And it's going to happen again, and again. Has to happen. Nice night." "You're mine now." "Needless to say I have some unusual habits, yet all these socially acceptable people can't wait to pick up hammers and smash their food to bits. Normal people are so hostile." "People fake a lot of human interactions, but I feel like I fake them all, and I fake them very well. That’s my burden, I guess." "Blood is... (my life) my job." "There are no secrets, just hidden truths beneath the surface." "Truly amazing the things you can do when you put your mind to it." "Everyone hides who they are." "Open your eyes or I'll staple your eyelids to your forehead." "Tonight's the night -- really." "I really need ... to kill somebody." “Her husband’s a crack head and her boyfriend's a serial killer, it’s kind of hard not to take that personally.” "Open your eyes and look at what you did!!!" "When do I ever ask you for anything?!" (Asking Deb to go out with Rita.) "Blood...sometimes it sets my teeth on edge. Other times it helps me control the chaos." "Trust me, I definitely understand." "I've never seen such clean, dry, neat-looking dead flesh." "Interesting hand job." "She's perfect, because in her own way, Rita is as damaged as me." "Nah, Miami is too hot for all that leather." "The killer is an artist." "The only real question I have is why, in a building full of cops, all supposedly with a keen insight into the human soul, is Doakes the only one that gets the creeps from me?" "Where's my sister?" "I was hoping you could dig up an old case file for me. It's the crime scene where Harry found me." "I didn't even know you existed." "I drove away a brother who accepts me, for a foster father who betrayed me. I'm not alone, and Harry kept it from me." "I'm on edge. 38 days, 16 hours and 12 minutes have passed since I killed my brother." ~ It's Alive - Season 2 "For weeks I've known who's next. He belonged to me. I just needed Doakes to take a night off." ~ It's Alive -Season 2 "I need to uh...curse someone." ~ It's Alive - Season 2 "I'm not a tourist." ~ It's Alive - Season 2 "A blind man. Not very sporting, I know. But I'm not one to discriminate based on race, gender or disability." ~ It's Alive - Season 2 "I've always enjoyed my work. It brings order to the chaos, fills me with civic pride - but what was that back there? Not Voodoo. When I picked up the knife it's like I didn't know who I was. I come here to dump bodies, not beer bottles. Now I'm just a litterbug." ~ It's Alive - Season 2 "It'll be OK. I followed the code, the stalk was good. I'm just a little rusty since killing my brother. Or maybe I took pity on my victim. I mean sure, he's a heinous killer, but he also bumps into walls." ~ It's Alive - Season 2 "I was there. I saw my mother's death, a buried memory, forgotten all these years. It climbed inside me that day and it's been with me ever since, my dark passenger." "It's time for you to go away." "This is what he wanted me to find all along. He's showing me where to go." "Just lucky, I guess.." "You're not a trophy - but you need to be put down." ~ Born Free, Season 1 "Doakes always knew I was hiding something. Now he knows. My devil danced with his demon and the fiddler's tune is far from over." "It's not what I want. But what I want doesn't matter. This is the only way I know how to survive." "I'm doing mental jumping-jacks." "I wish I could have fun - with Doakes tailing me, my life's been all Jekyll and no Hyde. No moonlight play-dates, no late-night social calls. Not one. My brother would be so disappointed." "That's not entirely accurate..." "Let that be a lesson to you." "Deborah can't sleep in an empty house anymore. In fact she can't sleep much at all. I guess that's what happens when your fiancee tries to slice you up into small, bloodless pieces." "Pathetic." "I can't even get donuts right. What's going on here?" "Oops - caught me." "I could think of easier solutions." "See, she's yelling at me now. Look, I'm no expert, but I think Deb could use some real girl-time." "Harry would prefer I take more time, but my life is falling apart. Whatever stopped my knife before, won't stop it again." "Practice, practice, practice." "Hi. My name's Dexter - I can't think of anything clever to say." "That was.. unexpected." "Hey Sergeant! Thanks for supporting the bowling team." "My new friend thought I wouldn't be able to resist the kill he left for me, but I did. I'm not the monster he wants me to be. So I'm neither man nor beast. I'm something new entirely, my own set of rules. I'm Dexter." "I can't kill Meridian yet. I need another therapy session." "39 days, 22 hours, and 18 minutes since I killed my brother. I am cursed." "Donut?" "I don't normally experience failure." "I'm drifting. I finally get a chance to kill and I can't do it." "Where is the orderly, controlled, effective Dexter? How did I lose him?" "Here I am, back in the belly of the beast. But how can I solve a crime, when I can't even solve what's wrong with me?" "Tell me about it. The last thing Miami needs is another serial killer." "I'm more of a crying on the inside kinda guy." ~ Waiting to Exhale, Season 2 "This neighborhood - full of crazies. I'd lock my doors" "I will not kill my sister, I will not kill my sister, I will not kill my sister." "I'll never understand how people deal with death - why they just can't put it in its place." ~ Waiting to Exhale, Season 2 "Red rover, red rover- send Chino back over." "Actually it's two - uh oh." ~ Waiting to Exhale, Season 2 "Not to mention, my guys deserved it" ~ Waiting to Exhale, Season 2 "I can't afford to lose it like this. Not with Special Agent Rock Star on my case." ~ Waiting to Exhale, Season 2 "I need to clear the decks - and my head" "I'm coming for you tonight Lil Chino, and this time there won't be any screw ups." ~ Waiting to Exhale, Season 2 "Another beautiful Miami day, mutilated corpses with a chance of afternoon showers." "Happy Hour. Now there's a misnomer." "I see their pain. On some level, I even understand their pain. I just can't feel their pain." "The problem with eating and driving, which I love to do, is not being able to employ the 10-2 hand position on the wheel. It's a matter of public safety. But there's always a sacrifice." "Preparation is vital. No detail can be overlooked, and the ritual is intoxicating." "If the eyes are the windows to the soul, and grief is the door - as long as it's closed, it's the barrier between knowing and not knowing. Walk away from it and it stays closed forever. But open it and walk through it, and pain becomes truth. And now I'm faced with the struggle for my own survival that I always knew was coming. I've been preparing for this my entire life." "I have to say goodbye in order to reconnect with what's really important. With who I was; with who I have to be." "I'm not the monster he [The ITK] wants me to be...so I'm neither man, nor beast. I'm something new entirely, with my own set of rules.... I'm Dexter." "They uh, ate my puppy...." ~ Waiting to Exhale, Season 2 "The mask is slipping." "I don't have a badge. I have a laminate." ~ See-Through, Season 2 "Make up your mind." "In our most paranoid moments we feel everyone is talking about us." "Never take your dirty laundry to work." "That is some big hair" - Season 2, Something about Harry "Everyone comes to Florida to die. That's why we have the most junk" - season 1, Popping Cherry “And I am entirely confident you’ve earned the privilege of being repurposed as fish food.” Season 3 Our Father “Narcotics raided this place at noon today. The drug rats won’t return to their nest for a couple of days. Plenty of time to…do what I have to do.” Season 3 Our Father “ All part of the grand code of Harry.” Season 3 Our Father “How about Fred Bowman, AKA, Freebo? Kills two college girls and skates on a State Police Screw-up. Otherwise known as Florida’s catch-and-release-program. Then he falls off the radar. Everyone’s radar but mine.” Season 3 Our Father “Dexter the donut guy; part of my routine. But let the record show…I’m not the only one with a daily ritual. Angel Batista…bear claw.” Season 3 Our Father “Vince Masuka, lemon custard.” Season 3 Our Father “Oscar Prado tried to kill Freebo; then he tried to kill me. No way he was there on some noble Boys’ Club mission. He’s got to be guilty of something. Aren’t we all?” Season 3 Our Father “Harry. He finds a kid in a pool of blood, and turns that kid…me….into his own personal vendetta machine.” Season 3 Our Father “ And what did you do when you saw the monster you created in action? You killed yourself. And I was abandoned…again.” Season 3 Our Father “Junkie? Looking guiltier all the time, Oscar.” Season 3 Our Father “So much for uncomplicated.” Season 3 Our Father “Or it may lead them to Freebo. I need to check out Teegan’s place. Now. We’ll skip dessert, Rita will be glad to leave early.” Season 3 Our Father Cody : Howed you get that scar Dexter: Sword fight. I won. "You have made me your sworn enemy, evil woman." Speaking of Rita's Mother when she asks Dexter to tell her everything there is to know about him. "Perhaps I have misjudged you, O wise one" Speaking of Rita's mother after saying that the Bay Harbor Butcher has her seal of approval. "Nice hand job." About Tuchi's missing hand. Dexter: Hi, you wanted to... Lundy: Morgan, come in. Can I offer you some tea? Dexter: No, thank you. I'm...(Voice Over): And he pours it anyway. He's trying to throw me off balance, show that I don't have the power to say no to him. Lundy: How about some sesame crackers to go with that? Dexter(Voice Over): So I'll say yes to everything. (Spoken) I'd love some. Lundy: Oh, sorry. Guess I ate them all. Dexter (Voice Over): A**hole. "The Lila experament is over" Lila: (about Cody) He's trying to control you. By hiding toys in your bag, you have no choice but to return them to him. Dexter: He's seven. He seldom has thoughts more complicated than the desire for candy. Rita: Oh dexter, how's Deborah? Dexter: Well, she has all her limbs. Rita: Imagine falling for a serial killer. Dexter: Yeah, what are the odds? "I don't blame my foster parents for that. Harry and Doris Morgan did a wonderful job raising me. But, they're both dead now. No, I didn't kill them. Honest." Dexter (Voice Over): Lundy's bees are buzzing. Something has agitated the hive. (voice over) " It's strange to have a creation out there, a deeply mutated version of yourself, running lose ans screwing everything up. I wonder if this is how parents feel." Deb: "Sweet Mary mother of **** that's good." Dex: " I think you might have broken a commandment somewhere in there." |
| Book: Dearly Devoted Dexter |
| "It is always a bad idea to follow a regular routine, particularly if you are a homicidal ********* who has come to the attention of Dexter the Avenger." (Chapter 3 pg. 17) Harry: "We can't always do what we think we have to do. So when there's nothing else you can do, you wait." (Chapter 10 pg. 95) Kyle Chutsky: "Follow the money. Works every time." "Chutsky tried very hard to be chummy and pleasant, as if he decided that when you can't tell the truth you might as well be charming." "For me, to decide is to act." "How true it was that we never appreciate things until we must do without them." (Chapter 20 pg.185) "Complaining had never done me a bit of good." (Chapter 20 pg.185) " When you're not wanted there's not much you can do except leave." (Chapter 26 pg.248) |
| Michael C. Hall |
| ~ I like olives. ~ (About the character of Dexter) I think Dexter is a man who…a part of himself is very much frozen, or arrested in a place that is pre-memory, pre-conscious, pre-verbal. Something very traumatic happened to him, he doesn't know what that is. And I think on some level he wants to know. He denies his humanity, he describes himself as someone who is without feeling, and yet I think that he maybe suspects - in a way that maybe isn't even conscious yet when we first meet him - that he is in fact a human being. Dexter's a unique killer in that his father saw his dark impulses, shined a light on them, and told Dexter that he saw them, he accepted them, that Dexter is good and that he is worthy of love. And I think that's what enables him to focus his energies in this unique way. ~ (About his Golden Globe nomination for "Dexter"). The show has momentum, it's captured people's imagination.... I won't deny that it's a thrill to be recognized in this way. I'll bring as many people [to the Jan. 15, 2007, Globes ceremony] as I can, based on how many tickets they give me. ~ It's interesting to play a role where you don't really have to preoccupy yourself with any need to convince yourself that you're not acting. ~ People feel like they know me from the work I have done, but it's not me. |
| Harry Morgan |
| "Lose control, become powerless, and lose it all." "Dexter, enough with the psychopath BS. You're in control of your urges, not the other way around!" "Remember this forever: You are my son, you are not alone, and you are loved." |
| Misc. |
| Camilla: "You don't bring me donuts." Dexter: "And you don't sing me love songs." Harry Morgan: "Son, there are people out there who do really bad things. Terrible people. And the police can't catch them all. Do you understand what I'm saying? " Teenage Dex: "You're saying... they deserve it. " Masuka: "Hey, better bundle up." Dexter: "I like the cold." -from Born Free- Lt. LaGuerta: "Tell me Dexter, how do you get to be so smart?" Dexter: "Hmm... Lots of sleep." Doakes: "********, what the hell were you really doin' in here?" Dexter: "The **** are right there." Doakes: "Yeah, but in ten years you've never rented a single porn title." Dexter: "Huh, how would you know? Call me an 'office crazy' but, your humbling interest in my personal life could be misinterpreted as harassment in some circles." Doakes: "So report me." Dexter(in head): "I could think of easier solutions..." Doakes(as he leaves):"Nice ****." Doakes: "Just make sure we check the dock slips for criminal records, it's possible the victim was killed by one of these boat owners out here." Dexter: "Yeah or maybe it was just an easy-access spot to dump a corpse at night. There are no light poles, the freeway exit ramp's just a block away." Angel: "He's got a point." Dexter to Lil' Chino: "Look at that...steady as a surgeon." (plunges knife) - -from Waiting to Exhale- Dexter: "I told you, blood spatter doesn't take up all my time, maybe I can help." Camilla: "You have a morbid sense of fun." Dexter: "That's probably true." Dexter: "Look." Mike Donovan: "No." Dexter: "Ah..yes." Donovan: "No, no." Dexter: "It's horrible, isn't it, isn't it? Open your eyes and look at what you did!! Look or I'll cut your eyelids right off your face. It took me a long time to get these little boys clean. One of them had been in the ground so long he was falling apart, I pulled him out in bits and pieces." Donovan: "Hail Mary, full of grace-" Dexter(slaps him): "Stop, that never helped anybody!" Donovan: "Please, you can have anything." Dexter: "That's good, beg. Did these little boys beg?" Donovan: "I couldn't help myself, please, you have to understand!" Dexter: "Trust me, I definitely understand. See, I can't help myself either. But children, I couldn't do that, not like you. Never, ever, kids." Donovan: "Why?" Dexter: "I've got standards." |
| James Doakes |
| Doakes(to Dexter): "Shut the f*** up and write your report already. I don't even know why I need you. Grab a crayon psycho and scribble this down." Doakes: "What's your thing psycho?" Doakes:"Lab geek, my a**!" |
| Funny |
| Doakes:You give me the f***ing creeps. Dexter: Yeah, I know. Sorry about that. Deb: "I knew her, now she's dead..." Dexter: "Do you want a hug?" Deb: "F*** off." Gay man: "Are you finding Dr. Meridian helpful?" Dexter: "Nah, I'm a sociopath....there's not much he can do for me." Gay man: "Cute AND funny!" (what's funny here is that Dexter wasn't even joking) Rita: "Oh Dexter, hows Deborah?" Dexter: "Well, she has all her limbs." Rita: "Imagine, falling for a serial killer." Dexter: "Yeah, what are the odds." Doakes: "You're supposed to be preserving the crime scene, a**hole." Doakes: "Angel, you keep up with this woo-woo ****, I'm gonna walk right through you." Rita: "I can't help it. I kill things." Dexter: "That must be awful." Masuka: "Say it." Dexter: "You're my Daddy." Masuka: "Sounds weird when you say it." Lundy: "Hearing's the first thing to go. Or is it memory? I can't remember." Angel: "You know, Pascal is just caught up in a cycle of reaction. She's not co-creating her own reality." Dexter: "You know those words don't actually mean anything, right?" Masuka: Hair pulling may not be manly, but it's very effective (advice given to Dexter to protect himself from Debra) ~There's Something About Harry, Season 2 Masuka: Hey Morgan, do you want to sit on my lap and tell me what you want for Christmas? Debra: No thanks, the last thing on my list is a burning sensation when I pee. Masuka: Your victim was smothered. That's not opinion, that's science. And science is a cold-hearted ***** with a 14 inch strap-on. |
| LiLa Tournay |
| Lila: This isn’t art. This is cottage porn. Lila: pardon my T**ts (Upon discovering that Dexter is the Bay Harbor Butcher) Lila: "No wonder he is so shut down!" Doakes: "What are you? His accomplice?" Lila: "... I'm his soulmate" |
| Angel Batista |
| Angel (To Dexter): You musta' been a ************ at cats-cradle Angel: (Refering To Sgt. Doakes) What crawled up his ass? Deb: He hates lab rats. Angel: Well here’s a headline, it's lab rats that make us cops look good. Angel and Deb Examining Neil Perry's Stash Deb: This is a record of everything he's ever done. Angel: I got photos. Deb: Those are his crime scenes. Did we release those photos to the press? Angel: No. Deb: Did he take them himself? Angel: He had to. Deb: Did we just hit the motherload? Angel: No. We hit the ************' motherload. Angel: According to the DMV, this is where Perry lives. Deb: Ew, with his seven inbred cousins by the look of it. Something has gotta be wrong with somebody that can live in a steel box. Angel: Aluminum, actually. Nina and I had a deluxe multi-sectional. Deb: For real? Angel: It was our starter home. Psych patient: (Repeating) She knows. She knows. Angel: If she knows, you yapping about it ain't gonna change it. Masuka: How come you got a hug and I get a pat on the nose? Angel: Cause you're like a retarded puppy. Deb: The Bay Harbor Butcher is one of our own. Lundy: We keep this to ourselves for now. Just the three of us. Angel: Well I'm gonna go tell it to a bottle of scotch. Dexter: (about Lila) She's not really a decorator. Angel: It's not really my apartment that I want decorated. Angel: I heard that Doakes walked off in the middle of Lundy's questioning, and uh, Lundy didn't stop him. (Deb glares at him) I might've heard that wrong. Dexter: Angel, if I got to choose a person, a real person, to be like, out of anyone, it'd be you. Angel: Not really sure what that means, but thanks Dex. |
| Debra Morgan |
| "I'm sorry Dex but she is gross. And pale. And nobody's pale in Miami. She is obviously a vampire. A gross english ti**y vampire." "Put those away or I will shove them up your ass." Deb sees handcuffs come out for Batista. "Pale like a fcking corpse." Deb giving a desciption of Lila. When Lila asks Dexter if he's coming with her. " Oh, my god. What did you do to make her so pathetically crazy for you? Does your dick dance?" |
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